Okay, I know it looks like I have abandoned my blog, or died and left it alone. Neither of those things is true. Obviously I am still alive, or a very talented ghost. ;) I have, however been sick. My body decided that I needed an entire winter of being ill, this has not happened for a few years. I have managed to stay out of the hospital, though and that makes it not so bad. At the moment I have no voice, not even a squeak. I am extremely annoyed by this! I'm a talker, I talk all the time, even when I am the only one here. Yeah...not today I don't! Yuck!
Last Thursday...I wore Converse hi-tops for the first time in over a year! I was so happy SO happy! My feet/ankles/lower legs are finally not grossly swollen! It's been hard to pick shoes, but now it's because I have too many choices!
Showing posts with label sick. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sick. Show all posts
January 7, 2011
Sick and tired!
I am really sick of being sick and tired. It feels like so much has happened with my health all at once, and to be honest it's really overwhelming. All this new stuff to learn about, to figure out how to cope with...and it's not like the other stuff goes away, it needs the same attention it has been getting, if not more.
It scares me that I have been admitted to the hospital twice recently, for multi-day stays. I don't like being in the hospital, but even more than hating being in the hospital I hate lugging around an oxygen tank every time I leave the house. Of all the medical related equipment I have had to deal with, the oxygen tank is the one I am most embarrassed by. I don't know why, it just is, I guess.
I think the thing that bugs me most is that I've been sick since I was 14 years old! Yeah, 14. I haven't gotten a single not sick day since then. I don't get to take a break from this, it's 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for 21 years! That's a long time...and that number is just going to get bigger.
I also know that even though I want to quit and not play anymore...that won't happen. I will manage all the new sick along with the old sick because that's the only thing I know how to do. As much as I really would like to give up, I can't do it...I've tried. I know that's a good thing, but it's also a pain in the ass!
It scares me that I have been admitted to the hospital twice recently, for multi-day stays. I don't like being in the hospital, but even more than hating being in the hospital I hate lugging around an oxygen tank every time I leave the house. Of all the medical related equipment I have had to deal with, the oxygen tank is the one I am most embarrassed by. I don't know why, it just is, I guess.
I think the thing that bugs me most is that I've been sick since I was 14 years old! Yeah, 14. I haven't gotten a single not sick day since then. I don't get to take a break from this, it's 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for 21 years! That's a long time...and that number is just going to get bigger.
I also know that even though I want to quit and not play anymore...that won't happen. I will manage all the new sick along with the old sick because that's the only thing I know how to do. As much as I really would like to give up, I can't do it...I've tried. I know that's a good thing, but it's also a pain in the ass!
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